If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Randomize
