There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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