I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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