Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Randomize
