I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Randomize
