when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
