Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
