Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
