Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
