My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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