We won't sleep together?
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
