Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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