Can Purell be used as lube?
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I'm passing your future prison.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
