Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I need to align my fucking chakras
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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