I wish i was in the wii world.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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