He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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