Rock
Scissors
Fuck
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
