i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
