In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize