I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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