WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
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