I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?