Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
