i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
this will be a night to untag.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Randomize
