All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
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