Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize