The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize