I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Randomize
