That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
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