her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
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the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
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Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize