CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Congratulations! We have a period
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
