Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
