Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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