At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize