We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
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