i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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