would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
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