She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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