that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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