see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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