Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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