Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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