But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
