Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
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