No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
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