ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
