There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
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I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
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He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS