i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Randomize
