We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
