Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Randomize
